Bio copywriting help....needs critisism to make better

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Bio copywriting help....needs critisism to make better

Postby jax archillies » Tue Feb 17, 2009 12:52 am

hey, i really, really, really hate my bands myspace written copy.

please visit the site, pause the music, and read the text.

to me i don't think that huge bio section needs to be even there.

i would say cut out all the members bios and focus on the band as a whole.

also i think its a bit FLUFFY with its word usage.

i would like to get outside opinions BEFORE i bring it up, so I can have a bunch of suggestions beside mine to add.

ive already scaled down the HUGE images, to something manageable on a regular monitor.

http://www.myspace.com/seventyfivesummers

and yes i have a new logo, as that one pretty much bites.

Image

ill post up my corrected solutions after I see some heavy criticism.

:D:D
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Postby MINImama » Tue Feb 17, 2009 4:28 am

I like the new logo. Check your PM.
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Postby Gottoon » Tue Feb 17, 2009 5:19 am

No comment on the bio...Don't really care about that stuff, no offense. But your music is good... I will be spreading some words around about the upcoming show at Tempe Marketplace !!!
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Postby jax archillies » Tue Feb 17, 2009 6:36 am

understood. i could care less about whats written myself right now, as whats written pretty much sucks exhaust fumes....

it seems self inflating in a way and waaaay to wordy.
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